Bite 81: So Many Ways to Relate to God

How Did We Get Here?

Keeping the picture big, what is Paul’s train of thought that brought us to the address of individual groups who have an option between following unwise or wise? There is a long line of comparisons I see. When I went back a couple of chapters, Paul has been using them for a while now.

And he articulates here reasons for choosing the better of the two paths for life: the days are evil. So don’t be dumb on purpose, but know Jesus’ will. Don’t numb yourself, but be active in relationships with one another and with God.

For some time, Paul has been exhorting his audience to this active and right living. All along he’s been defining this virtuous living using examples common to the recipients. Have they needed to figure out for themselves what is right or wrong up to this point? Paul made sure there was no confusion about what it was to be a Gentile. Look at Ephesians 2:11-12. Now as God-fearers, they had basic theology, knowing God. Going from being alienated from God to being forgiven by Christ, they knew what forgiveness looked and felt like. Paul used points of contact between their experiences and what wise-walking looks like.

Continuing that theme, Paul connects to Jesus every imperative he hands out to individual groups. Not only does this explain how they should live, it also demonstrates that Jesus is the ultimate reality. The source of all goodness and truth. Because like we noticed in the last Bite, everything that is done is to, for, through some person of the Trinity.

What is the Big Picture?

My effort now is to understand the big picture in the midst of the details. Why does Paul identify each of these groups? What is his goal in teaching to these points? He isn’t coming out of left field here in order to shine a spotlight at individuals, he’s following his current train of thought. Ever keeping context in mind, we just saw that the Church is called to right living in a general sense while that life has the focus of living in line with who God is. All of life, all of God.

I want to avoid the usual tack of “how do I wife better?” Or “what does a godly employee look like?” Even something about another group like “Child, do what I say or you won’t get blessing.” Paul loves his converts, but his love for Christ far and away surpasses. In his love for God, he reveals optimal paths to relationship with our Dad in heaven. Which in smaller degree also in some cases also shows those outside the family of God the path to their own relationship with God. And God rejoices over his lost sheep coming home. Which would, of course, fire Paul’s heart to worship.

Since Paul’s line of thinking has been this right living while being attentive to who God is and what pleases him, I’m going to effort not to isolate groups of people but try to study the passage more as a whole. The groups are important else Paul wouldn’t have pointed them out as examples. However, if you’ve been hanging out and studying with me for a while, you know that I’ve been endeavoring to keep all the trees in view rather than getting right up into the bark of just one.

5 W’s and an H

Today, the tool I’m using to analyze the text are the 5 W’s and an H. Wait. Grammar quandary. The 5 W’s and an H is one unit as a tool but there are multiple questions. Do I say the tool is the 5 W’s or the tools are the 5 W’s? Guess I’ll mix it up there and get 50% right…what do you think, fellow grammar stickler?

Anyway. My structural diagram is getting full with all my scribbles so I used my trusty sticky notes as I asked questions of the text. Looking things over, I chose words in the English text that either act as verbs (imperatives) or in some way modify verbs. Maybe these are all verbs, though reverence seems like a noun at times. The type of word isn’t the point though.

• submit
• love
• reverence/revere/respect
• obey
• honor

Then I asked questions. For example, here are the questions I asked around the imperative submit. Which we will look up in a dictionary in just a minute to make sure we understand how Paul intended the word to be understood.

• submit to whom?
• why submit?
• submit how?
• root (why) of submit?

Not all of the 5 W’s and an H apply to every situation. Paul doesn’t designate “where” when discussing submission, for example. And in the above instance, there were two ways to consider the “why.” Here are my stickies:

As I consider my analysis, I see the pattern continue of Paul using examples his audience can relate to as well as how each point of right living relates back to the Trinity in some way.

Relatable Examples

Paul uses a number of relatable examples his audience will hear and say to themselves, “Oh yeah. I do that.” Or conversely, “Ugh. I hate it when people do that.” Here are a couple that stuck out to me.

Nourish and Cherish

In explaining what love looks like in a husband/wife relationship, Paul exhorts the husband to love her as he loves himself. (Keep Ephesians 5:28-33 in front of your mind.) Which not only describes the kind of love the hubby needs to have for his wife, but explains default human nature as well. Imagine the following.

Universally, both the ancient Middle Eastern husband and a modern husband understands himself to know that he first and foremost takes care of himself. Hungry? Eats hummus and pita. Hot and tired? Takes a roof-top nap in the shade. Feeling bored? Practices Krav Maga.

Okay, maybe that last one wouldn’t have happened in Paul’s day since it is a relatively modern form of self defense, but can you see what I mean? Mankind does what it takes to satisfy himself. This is the love Paul says the husband should have for his bride. What needs/desires/dreams does his wife have? As he would provide for himself, provide for his wife.

Eye-service and People Pleasers

In the same way, does anyone genuinely like or respect a “yes man”? Someone who’s whole goal is to be liked by everyone. No integrity or backbone. The one who only cares that everyone likes him.

See? Examples that are familiar to your average human.

Relating to the Trinity

These examples that Paul uses are the tools which allow us to relate to God. To discern what is pleasing to the Lord, we can examine these examples of human nature and realize that they are connections between God’s nature and our own. He doesn’t like his workers to be people pleasers any more than we do. Under the banner of his love for all of his own, he wants his daughters loved here in this life by their husbands. As he desires his own to obey him, he wants good for his littlest people and that means they obey their parents.

Points of contact. Relatable. God is not so other that we can’t understand him. All of the things we’d like in our lives: to be surrounded by other good workers, women held in high esteem, peace in the home. These are in the best case scenarios of what God desires. His will.

This passage has aspects that need interpretation like comparing cross references or a jaunt through a Greek lexicon just like every other passage. As Peter has said, Paul sometimes writes things which are difficult to understand. This isn’t one of them. Mundane life situations need to be interpreted as that. Ordinary. Straightforward. They point us to God just as well as the complicated, “other” aspects of God.

We will turn our attention for a moment to understanding a couple of these hot-button words. Who knows? Maybe these words aren’t as offensive or complicated as the culture has made them to be. We are not far enough into our study process to apply them, but we will interpret and understand what Paul means as he writes to his audience.

Definitions

It’s been a while since I chatted with you about definitions of words. As you know, I dearly love to use my original language tools. I have the ones I find useful all laid out and linked together on the left side of my Logos screen.

Even though this is true, please don’t hear me saying that I think everyone always has to look words up in Greek dictionaries in order to understand the text. Our modern translators have made their best scholarly efforts to bring us translations that accomplish objectives. If you want to join the conversation that has gone before, you can look at this Basics article here.

In our English Bibles, there may be words that are unknown to us in English or Greek. By all means, look those words up in a modern Webster’s to at least have some level of comprehension. No shame. There is only room for learning when we realize we don’t know.

However when we do use a modern dictionary, we want to remember that meanings of words change over time. No language is static. Additionally, in translating from one language to another, there is no one-for-one equivalent for words. There are no codes to easily transition from one language to another.

Remember that we have a few tools in our toolboxes useful in understanding Paul’s meaning besides dictionaries, namely cross references and context. Using those tools first, let’s look at a couple of words that have caused brothers and sisters in my personal sphere spiritual tripping and confusion.

Submit in the Passage

You knew submit was going to be one, didn’t you? Leaving our backpacks which contain all our preconceived ideas at the door, let’s look at the two times the word is used in our passage.

20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.1

24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.2

Isn’t that interesting? When talking about looking at one’s own walk, he tells his audience that part of being filled with the Spirit is submitting to one another out of respect for Christ. The why is Christ and the what is this submit idea. Whatever that might be. But we do it to one another. Therefore, how can submitting be that terrible? It’s a blanket statement “submit to everyone.”

Then he also draws attention to the relationship between Christ and the church. The church submits to Christ. There isn’t even a call to do such a thing. Paul declares, “As the church does this, you do this.” Done. How can submitting be terrible? It’s a given here in our passage that the church submits to Christ.

Whatever this action is, it’s something not only a wife does with regard to her own husband, but is something each husband and each wife do together along with everyone else in the church. From Ephesians 5:20, they are even called to do it to each other!

So what is the action of submission? Because apparently every single one of us, regardless of our station or position in life, is supposed to submit somewhere, sometime, somehow.

Lexicon

Just quick, let’s look at this definition in Mounce’s dictionary. I’m choosing this one because his scholarship is the most modern, utilizing all the bits of data available to date. I’m bringing the first paragraph from the entry here because I see a distinction between two words that are present in our passage. Looking at them side-by-side in the entry will help us understand them both.

Verb: ὑποτάσσω (hypotassō), GK 5718 (S 5293), 38×. hypotassō means “to submit, be subject.” hypotassō in general communicates some sense of hierarchy. Context must determine, however, whether or not this subordination is required or voluntary, for hypotassō is not synonymous with obedience. Children, on course, are expected to obey their parents; Jesus was no exception. Luke clearly accentuates that while Jesus was chiefly submissive to the authority of the Scriptures and his heavenly Father, he was also “subject” to his parents (Lk. 2:51; NIV “obedient”). God expected his Son to obey his parents, and he voluntarily did so.3

I put in bold the points I want us to see clearly.

• This word submit indicates hierarchy
• Context indicates whether or not submission is required or voluntary
• The Greek word is not synonymous with obedience

In the case of Ephesians 5:21, the submission to one another out of respect for Christ is demonstrating our value for one another. Hierarchy of value. And that demonstration is out of respect for Christ, just to be clear.

Where the word is understood in the English text in relation to the wife, the wife is acknowledging and demonstrating the hierarchy in the relationship between Christ and the church (Ephesians 5:22-24).

Honor in the Passage

I’ve been so absorbed in our conversation that I haven’t noticed how long we’ve been at it. Quickly, we will look at what Paul is talking about when he uses this word honor.

In all of Paul’s writings that we have in our scriptures, he uses this word two times. Here in our passage where he commands children to honor their parents (Ephesians 6:2) and when he writes to Timothy. To Timothy, he says to honor widows who are truly widows (1 Timothy 5:3). Since the word is used both with regard to treatment of parents and those who are without a husband, this must be an attitude that can be achieved even if there is a rift between the offspring and the parent.

There is the previous command present in our passage of obeying parents which I think tends to color the reading of this next command of honor. Within the English translation is the phrase in the Lord.

Wait.

Nope, can’t do it. This is too much information for our time together today. I’m going to study this in more detail for my own self and then we will visit next time about this hermeneutical topic once I have my study-ducks in a row.

Reflection

As I attempt to interpret with a broad view, reflecting back should be more focused. Because my life isn’t broadly scoped. Quite narrow, actually. I have labels, categories that I am at different times and different relationships. From the text, I am a

• one another
• wife
• daughter
• bondservant

I assure you, no good will come from me reflecting on how this all might apply to my husband. Or let’s say that young woman who came to correct me, informing me that if I were gracious like her I would be doing it better. (No, I don’t struggle with bitterness. Whatever do you mean?)

Letting the laser beam Paul uses to identify weaknesses in particular groups to pierce the hardness of my heart, I need to embrace specifics. As a member of the group known as wives, submission to my husband is the number one line item of right living that troubles my kind. How do I know?

1. Paul mentions it.
2. He mentions it again in Colossians 3:18-19.
3. If it weren’t a real problem, based on the economy of papyrus, he wouldn’t bring it up multiple times and he wouldn’t spend all the time he does in our passage drawing word pictures to make it clear.

Me Toward My Beloved

When studying this passage, I see that what Paul says about Kristi has nothing to do with Jeremy. It’s because of my respect for Christ that I voluntarily insert myself lower in the hierarchy of leadership within our family. And even though Jeremy is an excellent husband, that does not change the challenge of submission for me. Because there is no one with whom anyone always agrees with on every point.

By way of reflection and small application, I will be watchful of when (not if) I am not submissive to my husband. Paul repeats himself. He draws comparisons. Therefore it is an issue I have a great potential to stumble over. I will choose to understand my husband and try to order my decision-making according to his preferences.

Not because Jeremy’s smarter than me. Because Jesus is. This is the family order he established when he established man and woman. Out of respect for my Lord, I will.

Wrap Up

I feel a little like I was scattered here because I was keeping distance from the details of individual groups. Well, trying. There is merit to verse-by-verse study so we don’t miss studying pieces of scripture. However, remembering Paul didn’t write in a stilted, verse-by-verse manner is also necessary.

Our Bible Study Bite today is with consideration of how to interpret the OT and the NT in these “this is holy living” passages. They arise in both testaments.

OT Law

The Mosaic Law which is the 10 Commandments and all the laws following was handed down to the Hebrews as a framework for holy living in nuts and bolts action.

"If fire breaks out and catches in thorns so that the stacked grain or the standing grain or the field is consumed, he who started the fire shall make full restitution."  4

I randomly chose a law based on its length and how succinct it was. But you can see: if such and such, then this needs to happen. This isn’t about the fire-starter’s motives, it’s the simple action of fire getting out of control by someone’s hand and it destroyed crops. Pay for it. Done.

NT Law

This is at least partly different than the homiletic writing of Paul here in our passage. Paul’s main intent is for the holy living to stem from the heart.

• Submit why? Reverence for Christ.
• Love why? Because it’s how Christ treats the church.
• Respect/revere one another why? Out of respect for Christ.
• Obey why? Because it’s right and Jesus is trustworthy.
• Honor why? Also because Jesus is trustworthy.

If you remember from our last conversation together in Bite 80, I observed for myself how all of Paul’s instruction has its origin in Jesus Christ. He is the ultimate reality.

This Bite is a distinction between an external action and an internal motive. As I studied for my own self today, a possible external action might be that I park my elderly little CR-V at the grocery store far out into the parking lot. This is the “law.” But why do I do that? The internal motive. Because I know that it’s my husband’s preference (and therefore now my preference) that the car not get a door ding.

In our study of these didactic sections in the NT, we have more heart issues to consider than if we were studying the OT Law. I’m not saying that there weren’t heart issues in the OT as well, but here in the NT, they are more the point. Have you ever noticed? Paul doesn’t give a lot of specifics for executing his “law.” It’s almost like God knew that specifics would be different for different people in different centuries. Like he’s omnipotent or something.

Sproul Speaks of the Two Types of Actions

For the last 25 years, we have had the habit of Jeremy reading out loud to me various genres of literature right as we go to sleep. I have one of those minds that has trouble being still. So he’s read to me to help me focus and be calm. Right now he’s reading a commentary by my hero R.C. Sproul. As I was drifting off, I heard this paragraph. It resonated with what I’ve been learning over here in Ephesians so much that I had to find the quote the next morning.

When God examines an action, he considers it both in terms of its external action and its internal motive. For example, the law requires that we don’t steal. If I refrain from stealing, I have done half the good deed, the external part. But the Bible teaches that a truly good deed is motivated by a heart that seeks to honour God, by a heart that is loving God. That’s the internal dimension of the good deed. Though my outward acts may in fact conform to the external demands of the law, if they do not spring from a heart that loves God, then they are motivated by selfish desire. It is in that high sense of goodness that nobody outside of Christ ever does a good deed.5

See how there is a kind of OT aspect that is concrete to stealing? But then there is another aspect which is of the heart. Oh, I notice it in the employer/employee section as I’m chatting with you about this. You could have a worker who does the stuff while the boss is watching. But if the worker doesn’t do the stuff when the boss isn’t watching, his heart is not honoring or loving God.

Our Bible Study Bite is to be able to make such a distinction between head and heart. Head obedience is the nuts and bolts. Heart obedience is answering Jesus’ question, “Do you love me?”

Thanks for studying with me today! If you’ve found anything helpful here, please like and subscribe. And if you know of other students of the Word, would you please share so we can all study and encourage each other with what we’re learning?

1. Ephesians 5:20–21 (ESV)
2. Ephesians 5:24 (ESV)
3. Mounce, W. D. (2006). Mounce’s Complete Expository Dictionary of Old & New Testament Words (p. 694). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.
4. The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (Ex 22:6). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles.
5. Sproul, R. C. (1994). The Gospel of God: An Exposition of Romans (pp. 66–67). Great Britain: Christian Focus Publications.