Bite 82: Ultimate Reality of Obey and Honor

I Had a Plan

Well, I did. Now I have a revamped plan. After cogitating on the truth that every action, external or internal, has its origin and motivation based on Jesus in my list portion of observation, I didn’t think there was a need to officially interpret. Noticing it, I could understand the ramifications of it, and I could immediately begin putting the reality into action by adjusting my worldview.

As a result, my plan needed to change. Last time we met, I studied and shared with you how God isn’t that other. He IS other, but he isn’t THAT other. Using Paul’s teaching and our own experiences, we can relate and yes, understand God. Or he wouldn’t have given us examples to which we can relate.

See? Why would he try to help us with word pictures if it were hopeless to relate to him? Once again, read through our passage Ephesians 5:15-6:9 and let that be your filter. God gave us examples because we are similar.

Why Choose a Particular Group?

You may be asking why did I decide to explore one of these groups when I’m striving to keep the picture big. You aren’t the only one: I asked myself.

As I studied, I realized that each grouping, each exhortation, also comes back to Ephesians 6:1-3. In a similar way to Jesus is ultimate reality, obeying and honoring parents are the roots of all the other groups. Especially when you consider that phrase in the Lord.

Side Note: A Bit of Textual Criticism

Remember in our last session (Bite 81 found here), that I started to talk about in the Lord? I stopped mid-thought because what I’d learned in my study was that there is a question around whether or not that phrase was in the original text when Paul wrote it. In my study, I found in the NET that there is a “tc” note right after this phrase. (You can see it for yourself here. It’s note 2 in Ephesians 6:1.)

To sum in brief, modern scholars speculate that some ancient scribes left this phrase out to prevent the audience from dismissing non-believing parents.

Which is interesting in my head because the way I’ve always interpreted the phrase in the Lord is the same way I’ve interpreted Ephesians 5:22 and Ephesians 6:5. If a “master” of some kind (this includes government and its legislation in Romans 13:1, and even husbands in 1 Peter 3:6) commands action that is contrary to the commands of God, not only should I not do it, I’m required to disobey. Civil disobedience in society and refusal to comply in the home are sanctioned by scripture (Acts 5:29). There is no call to ever blindly follow the human leader.

The NET articulates that the thinking of the ancient scribes who omitted the in the Lord phrase in association with the imperative to children and their relationship to their parents were attempting to eliminate the qualifier that you only need to obey Christian parents. Modern scholars, in part based on the similarity of construction of Ephesians 5:22, 6:5, do think the phrase was originally in Paul’s text.

Back to “Why One Particular Group?”

With my focus broad in order to keep the big picture in mind, targeting this section having to do with children and parents still seems like it is a broad view for this reason. Everyone is a child of someone. Even if you have a hard life story where parents weren’t involved or they were terrible parents and everyone wishes they hadn’t been involved…Everyone has parents. And the command to obey them and honor them comes only with the qualifier of all scripture: obey God, not man. As they give instruction or commands, only that which aligns with the Word is for the audience to perform.

Therefore, zeroing in on this group in reality keeps my view broad. This pertains to all humans everywhere.

Definitions

This could be lengthy, attempting to define these two complicated words. Obey and honor. For the sake of brevity, I will look at a few cross references to get the author’s general usage of the words and then I will glance at the dictionaries to verify and clarify what I gather from context. I will apply this technique with you to the first word. In that way, you can see what I’m doing. For the second word, I will more briefly share my findings so you have opportunity to get into the text, using these interpretation tools, without the distraction of someone else telling you exactly what they did.

Cross References

Interpretation from the Cross References

What do I learn about the meaning of this word obey from the context of the cross references?

From nature obeying Jesus, there is someone who is authority (the Creator of Everything) who gives a command to the created thing. “Peace, be still.” There was peace.

Then the supernatural has a run-in with Jesus (the Ruler of Everything). He who has authority over all things commanded the subordinate spirits. “Come out!” They came out.

Does nature or the supernatural have the ability to resist Jesus’ authority? I’m really not sure. But I do know that if they resisted, they were unsuccessful. And if Jesus’ authority is irresistible, they did what they were commanded. Does it matter? Nope, because the scripture doesn’t reveal all that there is to know about it. I’ve learned that these “entities” did what was commanded and then I’ll move on.

The instance in Romans 6:16 is a little different. Paul is saying that the audience can position themselves under the authority of one of two masters. Sin or obedience. In this case, there is an option for Man to decide his authority.

An Additional Verse

Next, I went to make sure I knew the context around Phil 2:12 and found this.

8 And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.1

What words do you see there that talk about Jesus’ attitude? His position? I see that Jesus humbled himself and obeyed to the death. Again, we could have a nit-picky theological discussion about could Jesus have resisted obedience or not. That isn’t our purpose. We are here to understand what the biblical authors are trying to tell us. Paul is telling his audience that Jesus positioned himself lower in authority than in reality he was. Didn’t count equality with God a thing to be grasped. Emptied himself. Humbled himself.

We can know Paul’s purpose isn’t about a choice because Paul doesn’t explain anything about that. What we can know is that he did it. And it was right because of God’s reaction to Jesus’ actions.

Organize Thoughts

I don’t know about you, but I need a list of what I’m learning. Here’s what I understand so far:

• Nature obeyed ✝︎
• Supernatural obeyed ✝︎
• For Man there are 2 options for masters
• ✝︎ humbled self/obeyed to the death
• Man can choose to obey or not (Phil 2:12, 2 Thess 1:8, 3:14)

I stuck that last point in there without talking to you about it. Look at those verses (and any others you may have found that are on topic) and see if you understand Paul’s meaning this way. If you think I’ve made an error about what he’s saying, let’s chat about it.

Abraham and Sarah

The author of Hebrews repeats himself in Hebrew 11. Over and over he speaks of ancients’ possession of faith and then acting. In our particular instance, Abe had faith and then obeyed (Hebrews 11:8-10). If you read on, the author tells us that he had information on which he acted. He had a promise of inheritance and there was a promise of eternal reward (he desired a better country, a heavenly one).

Noticing so much about informed faith in Hebrews 11, it makes me curious about our Romans 6:16 verse where Paul’s audience has a choice between two masters. How do they make an informed decision between sin and obedience as a personal master?

Working Backwards through Romans

Yep, that’s what I did. I scanned backwards through Romans to see Paul’s point of origin for his lengthy discussion. What informs the decision to obey one master over another? Romans 5:1. Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Why do the Romans have a choice between sin and obedience as masters? Because they have known the god behind the sin and they now know the God behind the obedience. Even into Romans 5:2, the Romans have access by faith, but they also rejoice in hope of the glory of God. A promise and a knowledge of the one who promises to act upon, just like Abe and his buddies in Hebrews 11.

Bringing it Back to Ephesians

I know that some would say that what I’m finding is obvious and can be learned from any (decent) sermon in any Bible-believing church. If there are any open… But in the course of my study, I’m not interested in assuming what someone else can tell me about my God. My purpose is to learn for myself what is true and then be able to discern truth from error for myself when I hear someone talking about God.

Moving backwards through Ephesians from our passage to see what the point of origin for Paul is in his current discussion, I found Ephesians 2:8. For by grace you have been saved through faith.

There is a mention of faith again. It all ties together. Do you see what I see? In our list of who/what obeys whom, the nature and supernatural is already informed. Elsewhere we know nature even groans. The wind and seas know who they are in the natural order. Jesus knows his Father and that he is trustworthy. From the rest of the list we see that Man is the only one with a question mark over his collective head.

Age-Old Questions

Is there a God? Who is he? What part does he play in the world?

An informed faith: yes there is a God, he is ultimate reality, and he not only is active in the world but he has promises for believers similar to Abraham. Remember Ephesians 3:6? This mystery is that the Gentiles are fellow heirs, members of the same body, and partakers of the promise in Christ Jesus through the gospel. As Gentiles (pardon my assumption if you are a Jewish believer and welcome, my friend), we are granted the same promises as the Jews through Jesus.

Does the audience believe that? As members of the greater audience, do we believe that? This belief or non-belief will decide who the master is.

But the Definition

I think I got a little absorbed with the cross references there. Investigation got exciting there seeing the correlation between faith and obedience. The motivation of obedience got involved. The word “obey” we can see from the context is to “do what one is told to do”. And that is exactly the definition Dr. Mounce used in his dictionary.²

I’m going to hit pause on this word for a while; mull it over. Especially the tie between faith and obedience because, in another Bite, this is where my application will come from. Depending on what I know to be true, I will act.

Honor

The honor has been more of an issue as I interact with people who aren’t youngsters. Particularly for the single ladies who either live with their parents as adults or are out on their own. Ladies who want to obey the Word but their parents’ preferences and their preferences don’t entirely mesh.

There’s one lady I remember in particular whose folks didn’t want her to marry a very nice but very bookish fellow. They thought she should marry a more lively, interpersonal man because they liked to hang out with that sort of person. But she was attracted to this quiet, studious fellow. This was a crisis situation for this friend of mine as we sat over our dinners in Dutch Mother’s in Lynden, Washington.

Was it wrong for her to marry the man she liked in opposition to her parents’ wishes? Did she honor her parents? Or another serious question to ponder is did her parents honor her (1 Peter 2:17)?

From the context, I have a hard time nailing down what the action of honor entails. I went to the dictionaries to get clarification.

Dictionaries

BDAG defines honor this way:

② to show high regard for, honor, revere3

Mounce defines honor in the NT this way:

timaō means “to honor, hold in esteem, place value on someone or something.” The verb includes showing respect to all people in general (1 Pet. 2:17) and recognizing those with specific status or needs (1 Tim. 5:3). This act of honor can be shown in practical and concrete ways, as when the people of Malta provide for Paul and his shipmates in response to Paul’s healing them (Acts 28:10). The most common example of timaō is the honor that one should pay to one’s parents (i.e., the fifth commandment; see Mt 15:4; 15:6; 19:19; Mk 7:10; 10:19; Lk 18:20; Eph 6:2).4

Mounce includes in his entries (when it makes sense) the usages of words in the OT as well. In the case of honor, in the OT this word is often associated with “heavy” or “weighty”. There is value that is placed on the honored person. Which makes sense with the weighty idea. If I value someone, they matter. They have weight in my life. Counsel they give receives deliberate consideration.

Reflection

The definitions I clarified for myself were obey and honor. Let me review those.

• To obey is to follow instructions, be subject to, to do what one is told to do.
• Honor is to show high regard for.

As I reflect on these two words in the light of the whole passage, I’m learning that everything has its source in God. How to execute points of holy living from the heart is exemplified by either by Jesus’ own actions or the actions of those who position themselves under Jesus’ leadership.

Jesus’ Example

Looking over the passage, I don’t see examples of obedience or honor in the child/parent relationship. Can we think of any in the rest of scripture, though? There is one account in Luke 2:43-51 where we can look through the window at what parenting the Perfect Child was like. And what it was like being parented as the Perfect Child. Can you imagine the misunderstandings and bafflements that would occur? In Luke, there was a “what in the world are you doing?” conversation between Mom and Son, but Jesus ultimately was submissive to them even in the confusion of his earthly parents.

I’m not even a little jealous of Joseph and Mary. Crackpot parents dealing with crackpot kids is a sort of equal footing. Being crackpot parents of Perfection? I don’t know how I would’ve dealt with that. With my own kids, I have the position when they mess up: Yep. Me too. I do not have this life thing figured out either.

Anyway, how did Jesus respond to his mom? He went home with her. His attitude? Submissive. Were Jesus’ parents asking him to behave in a way contrary to his heavenly Father’s explicit or implicit commands? Nope, so he obeyed his earthly folks. He showed high regard for his Heavenly Father’s commands by being in the temple teaching. And then he also showed high regard for his earthly parents’ commands by leaving with them to go back to Nazareth.

Obey and Honor per Jesus

Let’s picture this for a minute. How did Jesus know what he knew in order to tell the patrons of the temple? Maybe he had supernatural power to Know. But maybe he learned. How did he learn? Did his parents teach him? Maybe. Or did his parents give him opportunities to learn? Because the sources of the OT texts that 12 year old Jesus was reasoning through would have been at the least challenging to access by a blue collar worker like Joseph. So by displaying his understanding and answers in the way he did, he not only made his Heavenly Father “look good,” he made his earthly family “look good” too. Simple peasants with a wise child? They would have been parent super stars.

And then he listened to them, following them back home. Which, as a 12 year old, is the good and right thing to do. When the adult Jesus was sought by his mother in Mark 3:32, he did not follow her. He declared that those who do the will of the Father are his brother and sister and mother (Mark 3:35). Still obeying, but obeying in the Lord. Honoring, but after weighing deciding to honor God the Father more.

In our next Bite, I will make application from what I’ve learned here. But there is a lot to ponder as I’ve studied just a little of the ultimate reality that is Jesus in the arena of obey and honor toward parents.

Wrap Up

I’m not sure if this is legitimately a Bible Study Bite as such since it isn’t a hermeneutically technique I can look up in a text book. But a technique I’ve found useful in my own study (not to mention in all of my life) is to follow the imperative in Hebrews 3:1, consider Jesus.

There was a dark season of my life (feels a little familiar right now in 2020) where I was having trouble seeing light. I lived in Houston, Texas where it felt spiritually dark and oppressive. Depression was a reality for me in the midst of my oldest child going off the rails, “friends” abandoning me, and church drama.

This is why I encourage anyone who will listen to me, “study the Word for yourself!” While in that period of darkness and despair, I was studying Hebrews. Consider Jesus leapt out at me. In all the areas that were difficult and seemingly hopeless, I compared what I was enduring to what Jesus endured. Because his experiences on earth were relatable to mine.

Consider Jesus

As a form of study, let’s compare what I listed there as life difficulties.

1. A child going off the rails: Jesus taught and trained his disciples as if they were little children. He spent time with them, living with them, investing in them. Did any of them go off the rails at all?
2. “Friends” abandoning: Jesus had friends who not only abandoned him by running away from him at his arrest, when questioned about even knowing Jesus, one friend vehemently denied association.
3. Church drama: While I had church folk censoring me and blacklisting me for declaring sin as sin, I did not have anyone actually coming after me with pitch forks and rope to string me up a tree. That I know of…

Consider Jesus as a technique in study? It may not be in hermeneutical textbooks in a form I can point to or even recognize, but as a means of understanding how Jesus has suffered not unlike me? Invaluable. In fact, for my own life, it was the vehicle by which I drove out of the darkness and into the light once again. I’m not saying everyone will escape the bonds of depression because everyone’s hells are different.

As My Darkness Returns

I am saying that I’m earnestly revisiting this technique right now as the storm clouds of darkness feel overwhelming right now in this season of our nation walking the path it is currently walking. Where freedoms and liberties heroes of our nation fought and died for are evaporating. It might be depressing for you, my fellow student of the Word, but we don’t fake our emotions with each other, do we?

Application next time! I am determined to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.

Thanks for studying with me today. If you’ve found anything helpful here, please like and subscribe. And if you know of other students of the Word, would you please share so we can all study and encourage each other with what we’re learning?

1. Philippians 2:8 (ESV)
2. Mounce, W. D. (2006). Mounce’s Complete Expository Dictionary of Old & New Testament Words (p. 477). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.
3. Arndt, W., Danker, F. W., Bauer, W., & Gingrich, F. W. (2000). A Greek-English lexicon of the New Testament and other early Christian literature (3rd ed., p. 1004). Chicago: University of Chicago Press.
4. Mounce, W. D. (2006). Mounce’s Complete Expository Dictionary of Old & New Testament Words (p. 340). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.